A whole new world.

Well, as I promised, here is a little update of Rowan and his 2-year milestone. First off, I know every parent is biased, so there's no shame in me thinking that Rowan is absolutely hilarious and cute. Mind you, he is also very temperamental and has major meltdowns if he is tired, hungry or ornery. He wakes up screaming MOMMY and DADDY "where are you?" "I need out!" Literally yelling. From there, he does not stop talking until he falls asleep for naptime and the cycle continues. He says some pretty hilarious things. Yesterday he told on himself for throwing mulch on his friend while they were playing outside. I didn't see the incident, but thankfully Rowan felt

guilty (or just wanted something to say) and apologized and we called and asked for forgiveness from his friend. At the moment, Rowan is accompanying his daddy in the Starbucks drive-thru. Rowan actually enjoys coffee but because of his extreme energy level already, we give him one sip and call it quits. I'm not sure how Rowan's brain works, but he remembers everyone and everything you say which makes me very careful in the words I choose and the actions I choose for discipline. His current favorites: trains of any kind, Thomas videos (we only have one and it's getting really old), dump trucks, anything with wheels, pulling Tanner's tail, reading books to us (yes, sounds backwards, but he memorizes books and reads them to us...), Target (did I mention that I love this child?), bible study playing with kids, fruit of any kind, chocolate milk, and watching Wheel of Fortune and asking for certain letters. Our current battles are: talking politely and not demanding things of mommy and daddy, getting out of the house in a decent time frame,

diaper changes, eating meat and pasta, and hitting his mother. :) Time has really flown by, but I'm loving our conversations and teaching moments. He's truly hilarious and really does bring us joy.

**Rowan on his 2nd bday**

**A train themed party- what else?**

**Rowan's birthday pancake with candles**

Yearning

I sat in bed during naptime today and I couldn't help but let my mind and heart wander.... I came to a simple, short conclusion.... My heart longs for community and adventure. Plain and simple. I don't know what that will look like in Fort Wayne (or if we'll move someday) but I'm ready. Yes, I said it was short. Maybe I'll post soon and update you on the little man... he turned 2 last week!!

Planning

I'm such a planner. I can't help it. There is something fulfilling about taking my little calendar out of my purse and jotting down dates and times and events. I will say that being a SAHM doesn't require a whole lot of calendar planning. Generally once a week there is something fun and new to write down. But still, I just enjoy planning. And you can only guess what I think about all day as the holidays approach. How will we spend Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Years? Nothing to write down yet, but the anticipation is fun :) Anyone else just love planning?

Role Model?

Our book club is reading: Another Valley Another Victory Another Love by Valetta Steel Crumley. I can't begin to tell you how this book has challenged me. I could literally quote every page/chapter/verse. Here is one that I had to read about 5 times as God began to reveal Himself to me.

"If there is one message I would like to shout to every parent, it is this: every day that you live out your life before your children, you are imparting to them an entire value system, and what a phony set of values many parents dump on their children. Even Christian parents model life-styles characterized by money and material possessions. Such are vain and transient baubles when set in an eternal perspective. The fulfillment of selfish ambition, and the brief, fickle applause of man: how futile they will appear someday when seen in the light of eternity."

I had another long thought of my own posted here but I just erased it. This quote needs no explanation or elaboration, but I do believe it goes beyond the parent role to anyone claiming Christ as Lord and Savior. This is plain truth.

Funk.

Isn't it crazy how fast our moods & situations change? My least favorite "feeling" is being in a funk.. and I've been in a funk for longer than I have wanted to. Maybe it's the fact that I haven't been able to breathe out of my nose for over a month now and it keeps me awake at night. For several hours. Please funk, go away.

Celebration.

This weekend we had the opportunity to be a part of a special celebration for a dear friend who turned 30. It was so cool to see and experience so many different people all gathered together to celebrate the life of another friend. It's crazy to think about how we have all been impacted by him and how special and unique he is to everyone he encounters. Tonight I'm reflecting on the importance of celebrating individuals and in that, telling them how much we appreciate them and why thy are special to us. It's so nice to be affirmed, isn't it? Don't skip out on telling someone how much they mean to you or how they've impacted you. Dennis, you are a blessing to me in the way that you love my dear friend Emily and how you've befriended Kyle and I as if we've known each other forever. Thank you for letting us be a part of your life and celebrate this milestone with you. (old man.) :)

Vulnerability

I'm convinced that people, myself included, need to be more vulnerable. I never really understood what that meant until recently in life. I mean, I knew what it meant, but not what it looked like. Until I started truly wanting genuine relationships. Everyone in this world is trying desperately to cover up faults, failures, shortcomings, etc. It's absolutely ridiculous. Not to mention, isolating. Not only will people never know who you truly are, but you won't ever even know yourself. I say all this holding a mirror to my face because it's really challenging to let people know that you are far from a perfect wife, mother, sister, daughter and friend. My house is often tidy, but rarely clean. I don't shower daily. I often nap instead of pray or read. I sometimes feel like I have no idea what it means to be 'good' at any of my roles. I only really cooked one dinner this week. I daily have to apologize to my dog and my son for using the wrong tone of voice or being short with them. Some days I'd rather lay in bed than get up and live life. Ah, I feel better. Thanks for listening.